On weekdays, Neha Barman, who is in her 30s, works from nine to five, attends team meetings, and attempts to reach her goals. However, on the weekends she goes out and meets new people through common connections or dating apps. Even though she is gregarious, she finds that first dates are the most difficult to navigate. Suddenly, a series of uncertainties would surface: What should I wear? How should I respond? Is the initial impression incorrect? The first-date jitters are real.
However, boosting your self-confidence can make the whole experience way better. Confidence is attractive, and when you feel good about yourself, it reflects in your interactions. It turns awkward moments into funny stories and small smiles into big connections.
Here are five strategies to help you boost self-confidence on your first date.
Dress comfortably and confidently
One of the simplest yet effective ways to boost your self-assurance is to dress in a way that makes you feel comfortable and confident. Choose clothing that not only aligns with your personal style but also suits the occasion, allowing you to feel at ease in any setting.
When you are comfortable in what you wear, you naturally project confidence. According to a report released by the Association for Psychological Science, one’s self-perception can affect the decision-making process. The study revealed that when individuals dress to make a favourable impression, their brains are more inclined to engage in abstract thinking.
Whether it is a casual coffee date or a formal dinner, owning your look and embracing your personal style contributes to an authentic and confident interaction. You can also add some details to your outfit – a well-chosen accessory or a dash of colour.
Prepare conversation starters
Silences during a date can be awkward and might lead to nervousness. Counteract this by preparing a few conversation starters in advance. According to Delhi-based couple’s therapist, Shivani Misri Sadhoo, you can keep it light and simple by considering topics related to your common interests, recent events, or small anecdotes. For instance, imagine you find yourselves waiting for a table at a restaurant— you could break the ice by saying, “Do you have a go-to dish here, or should we try out something new?” Another situation might involve the classic movie dilemma. In that case, a simple, “So, are you more of a comedy or thriller person?” can help you navigate the situation better. You can also talk about something funny. By having such ice-breakers ready, you can boost confidence and make your first date more enjoyable.
Practise positive body language
Non-verbal cues play a major role in communication. “Positive body language can convey confidence, even if you are feeling a bit jittery inside,” says Sadhoo. She suggests maintaining eye contact, standing or sitting up straight, and using open gestures. Avoid fidgeting or crossing your arms, as these behaviours can make you appear closed-off or nervous. By practising positive body language, you will not only boost your self-assurance but also create a more inviting atmosphere.
Active listening
Listening actively is like a superpower on a first date. It is not just about hearing words; but about tuning in and showing you care. “It requires more than the passive act of hearing; it is a dynamic involvement in the conversation,” says Sadhoo.
Imagine your date sharing a cool story— lean in, nod, and ask questions to show you are genuinely interested. This simple move not only makes a connection but also boosts your own confidence. Let us say the conversation hits a quiet spot; active listening helps you pick up on cues to jump in with a follow-up. For example, if your date talks about a hobby, actively listening lets you catch their excitement and share your interests too. It is like a friendly conversation dance that takes away the pressure and makes the date enjoyable for both. By actively listening, you not only create a meaningful connection, but also shift the focus from self-consciousness to shared enjoyment.
Embrace the imperfections
Nobody is perfect, and embracing your imperfections can be a powerful confidence booster. Recognise that everyone has their quirks and insecurities. Instead of trying to hide your flaws, be authentic and true to yourself. Moreover, accepting your imperfections makes you more relatable and approachable to your date.
Boosting self-assurance while going on a date is a gradual process that involves mental and physical preparation. Remember, the key is to be yourself and enjoy the process of getting to know someone new.
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